Tuesday, October 11, 2011

GO AWAY SPAM FAIRY!!!

I love my Blackberry. And I think bbm is the shit!

I'm sitting on a tiny granite outcrop a 1000 kms from the Northern tip of Madagascar. And from this tiny little chunk of granite I am in communication with people at home, on the Med, in the States and of course right here on the island.

But what really sucks is when your contacts start sending ridiculous broadcast messages about forwarding other messages because if you don't something bad will happen!

Seriously, does one honestly think that the Blackberry server is getting full? That they care if there are a few thousand inactive bbm users? That they would go to the effort of somehow actually following up on every single stupid pointless forwarded message?

Has it really become so easy for the wool to be pulled over almost a quarter of my contacts eyes? Are we so easily convinced by a grammatically incorrect message? Do you also reply the email telling you that Obama endorses herbal supplements that will make you bigger in the you-know-where, that the "Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), Counter-terrorism Division and Cyber Crime Division in the J. Edgar. Hoover Building Washington DC" has just finished an investigation that proves you are owed $850 000 - 00 by some corrupt official in a West African country whose name you struggle to pronounce forget ever been in contact with one of their corrupt officials or the one that says you've just won the National Lottery - strange how the country's name of whose national lottery it is doesn't appear anywhere in the email! But really, its true! Just email your banking details to us and we'll send you the cash. Tax free!

My absolute favourite are the ones that stress that if you don't forward this message to a bazillion people in 35 seconds your ears will fall off, you will catch a nasty incurable disease and all your friends will stop talking to you but if you do send it to only 30 friends an entire village in Africa will be miraculously fed on the virtual print of the email! Bollocks! Stop wasting our time!

And don't lie, you know you've thought about sending that forward - actually you probably have!

Is it stupidity?

Is it boredom?

It is worrying!

My good friend Andrew stated in his status on bbm today that the next person to forward him one would be hoofed off his contact list. He's now one pretty girl less in his contacts list! Maybe we should all follow his example - let all the forwarders forward to each other and the non-forwarders carry on with real conversations.

And Hawks, no it’s not funny sending me them just because you know it pisses me off!



Thursday, October 6, 2011

Whaat!!!

Okay Waaaaaaaaaaaaat!

It has been waaaay too long to even start making excuses as to why I haven't written anything for my zero readers! (Okay, sorry Gregg, my single reader!)

Well, I'm back in the islands and life isn't hard - although at times it is rather frustrating! Just try get anything done of an official nature - which I've been doing trying to get Puff, The Magic Mobile, licensed. Banks close at 14:30 and most government offices at 3pm! And its sharp I tell you. If fact so sharp that if you arrive at 10 minutes to closing you can count yourself lucky if you're let in! And even bribery has to happen early - couldn't pay off the car inspector myself because he knocks off at 3pm too!

Anyway, as I was saying, life isn't hard, but it is slow! Things happen at snail's pace here. Simply. Don't try and change it. It makes our 'African Time' seem like a well oiled and efficient system! Even the change of season is slower this year. And that sucks cause it means more hiding inside from the galing SE than fishing and having to guide clients in winds that leave the sea birds flustered under grey skies - not ideal when you kinda rely on at least a clear sky or windless day to spot fish!

But this late changing of season thing does still beg that question; Is climate change happening that quickly and is it as real as everyone claims?

I suppose time will tell - but lets at least try make a change in our own dirty, carbon expelling habits before we all melt in an overheating world. Jeez, afterall don't you want your kids to go snowboarding?

Well, I lie, we did have one teasing day of NWerly and the ocean took on that oil slick finish that gets one all geared up to hop on a boat and hunt milkies! However, it was late and school was tiring so I lay in my hammock and mind surfed the reef of Point Cabris - it looked fun but that paddle is sack-off far! And I mind surf so much better than I surf at the moment! The pics below are little hazy - I blame the hammock but you get the idea. Its a fun little A-Frame that wedges into a tight barrel that will happily send you along the cheese grater of a reef if you're not awake!




Anyway, enough surf porn...

Holidays in SA were EPIC! But I plan on expounding upon those adventures a little later and with a bit more detail. Short version is I got to behave like a miscreant student for half of them and the other was spent catching up with old and new and new old friends!